It's the only cassette we've been playing in the car for some time now. It's a special cassette, in that a facsimile copy of it exists on MiniDisc. It's also special, in that it has survived what could only be described as "chocolate-powder damage", sustained from residing at the bottom of my navy blue school-bag.

It's the tenth year anniversary of this cassette, El's Formal Tape and although I cringe when I am reminded of the unbelievable hype that accompanied this event, I cannot help but feel slightly warmed by the memory of its construction. After all, it was all done at the request of my date, TAFKATC, who insisted it was my task for the evening.

It was an exceedingly important task, preparing a selection of songs for that 15-minute car ride together. On the scarce occasions when we did speak, we only ever bonded over 1980s synth pop... but they were terribly significant conversations and I had the tendency to retain them, as I had the tendency to retain everything.

Again, both myself and my best friend, Missy Laur had to deal with this problem, this scarcity of time issue that tended to pervade every aspect of this absurd (and thoroughly implausible) partnership. Missy Laur and I whinced and made endless lists. We aggressively crossed out song names and with every strike-through came three new "consequential additions". It was a list that was impossible to cull.

Perhaps if the car-ride had been 1,115 minutes long instead of 15, I could have included all the songs TAFKATC was responsible for. All that New Order, Erasure, Depeche Mode, The Smiths and The Cure. But this was my task and my challenge. It was an ordeal to deal with the technological restraints of his feeble MiniDisc and my rickety 90-minute cassette, but I loved it. I would have made more: The Formal Mixes - Volumes 1 to 250.

But now when I drive and listen to this cassette, I am baffled by some of my song choices. Paul Van Dyk's For an Angel? Basement Jaxx's Bingo Bango? Really? Some other song inclusions make more sense, such as the brilliant New Order megamix and Erasure's I Love Saturday from their 1994 album, I Say, I Say, I Say.

It was TAFKATC's objection to the degenerated sound quality of I Love Saturday that sticks out most in my memory of that whole car-ride. You see, Missy Laur and I had dubbed that song from my mix-tape to her mix-tape to my mix-tape (and so forth). It was emblematic, it somehow signified the love and reverence both she and I shared for this song.

Perhaps I was naive in thinking that this kind of connection could have existed for both him and I? Was I mad in imagining such a thing?


Nothing in this world can touch the music that I heard...
If only I could have imagined what would follow, some ten years later. TAFKATC sent me an email with the subject line, FAC, requesting my company to see New Order at Festival Hall. My 15 minutes had been extended to a full 90 minute set and I couldn't help but giggle as we sent texts to each other, dreaming of what songs they should play (and what cover band we'd inevitably form when Barney fails to meet our expectations).

I tend to let my memories slip by when I think of TAFKATC. I am far too embarrassed to acknowledge the youthful flirtatiousness I once had... but then I can't help but feel it still when he looks at me, when he entertains my musings. I don't care to ever forget the moment before the band even started, when he handed me his plastic cup of beer to sip: "You're still 17." He smiled. I could hardly disguise my grin in response. "I'll always be 17."

Cassettes & Chocolate Milk: Funk & Soul Podcast #41
Munk - Kick out the Chairs
Clairy Browne & The Bangin' Rackettes - Love Letter
Billy Paul - Am I Black Enough For You
John Legend - Used To Love U
India Arie - Video
Colonel Abrams - Trapped
Stevie Wonder - Part-Time Lover
Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers - Why Do Fools Fall In Love?

Download (51.5 MB)

Quite recently, I found myself completely wrecked, washed ashore, ruined. It was an accident really. The day before my birthday, I had asked my brother Andrew to get the microphone to work on my computer. I had a bunch of people coming around the next night and I had uploaded no less than 139 slop-tastic pop hits onto the freeware program, UltraStar, all in anticipation that we'd all have a bit of a wail. It's a bit like SingStar, except you can upload your own songs. Boney M. East 17. EMF. Whatever!

I came home from work and I was informed of the news: "Ugh. Your computer is broken." How? "I don't know but your operating system is not operating anymore." At the time, I took it on the chin. It was going to be OK. Sure, it meant there would be no howling karaoke shenanigans at my gathering. No Ganggagang. No Roxette. No Interpol. But I could deal with that. I suppose I can talk to my guests, if I really have to.

What followed was a severely long spell of computerlessness. It must have been a month, maybe more. I became aware of my totally crippling and unforgivably geeky addiction to my computer. It was like losing a limb, if a limb were as valuable as my hard disc. It was like my past had been deleted. Everything I loved, everything I was working on.. and perhaps everything I had envisioned myself to be. Pretty deep for a piece of hardware, don't you think?

Yet however grim that last paragraph, all was not lost. The very night of my birthday gathering, Louise carefully prepared a mixed CD simply entitled: Verses & Choruses for Eleanor's Birthday. It had been so long since I'd received a mix. I seem to recall I once found myself wrecked, washed ashore and ruined because of one. Even still, Louise's mix was so infectiously catchy, so heedlessly uplifting and so very carefully crafted. In my month of computerlessness, I listened to it endlessly and it made me feel so much better.

Andrew and my Dad bravely performed many many hours of painstaking surgery on my computer. The shonky sheisters at Microsoft even squeezed another upgrade out of us. But after all their hard work and persistence, my computer was up and running again! The programs were all scrambled, the drives were a little confused, but everything was great. I even had a new C:\ drive! Yes! You heard me! Gillions of more gigabytes to waste on mod revivalist compilations! I'd never been so grateful in all my life!


On an unrelated note: Roger Taylor at Narita Airport, 1975
My first order of business was to rip Louise's mix, Versus & Choruses. It was a breath of fresh air in the otherwise small, dingy, dusty cupboard that is my life. I thought it only appropriate, that after such a story that I would provide a linkie to that compilation. It's also appropriate because I have neither the time nor confidence to do C&CM Britpop Podcast #13. Maybe when self esteem comes in pill form?

Versus & Choruses
1. Psapp - Hi
2. Jens Lekman - Happy Birthday, Dear Friend Lisa
3. Camera Obscura - Teenager
4. Asobi Seksu - Thursday
5. Ariel Pink - The People I'm Not
6. Frida Hyvonen - Enemy Within
7. Kraked Unit - Douala Paris
8. Serge Gainsbourg - Ford Mustang
9. Yelle - A Cause Des Garcons
10. Katerine - Louxor J'adore
11. Inquiet - Middle of the World
12. Chad Vangaalen - Building a Home Like a Bee
13. Diane Cluck - Heat From Every Corner
14. Bon Iver - Blindsided
15. My Favourite - The Suburbs Are Killing Us (Remix)
16. MGMT - Of Moons, Birds & Monsters
17. Camille - Waves
18. Animal Collective - No More Runnin
19. Ladytron - Versus

Download (109 MB)

Mix Tape #3: Sinking
Genre: Melancholy Pom/Sooky LaLa/Twisted Tenderness
Date: July 2002

Compiled in the middle of Year 12, this mix tape documents the melancholy of a doting lyricist with a fondness for the unattainable. The tape explores the themes of sadness, unrequited love and futility. Yet the most beautiful aspect of these songs is the painful sense of hope. There is such warmth when Bernard Sumner insists that good times are around the corner, such reassurance when the very ill Freddie Mercury advises when the storms are raging around you, stay right where you are. Such a sense of relief when Andy Bell declares that he's never going home. However, the beauty and poetics of my description is nothing compared to the mix tape itself so I suggest you download it immediately.

Playlist for Mix Tape #3: Sinking
Side 1
1. The Cure - Sinking (1985)
2. Radiohead - High & Dry (1995)
3. Blur - Clover Over Dover (1993)
4. The Beatles - For No One (1966)
5. Queen - Don't Try So Hard (1991)
6. Coldplay - Trouble (1999)
7. Depeche Mode - Only When I Lose Myself (1998)
8. George Michael - Spinning the Wheel (1996)

Download Side 1

Side 2
1. Suzanne Vega - Left of Centre (1986)
2. New Order - Run Wild (2001)
3. Joy Division - Shadowplay (1979)
4. Erasure - Home (1991)
5. The Smiths - Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want (1984)
6. Jeff Buckley - Last Goodbye (live) (1995)
7. Muse - Unintended (1999)

Download Side 2

Mix Tape #2: El's First Driving Tape
Genre: New Wave/Britpop/Automatic
Date: January 2005

I'm not sure when it started, but I've always been seduced by the idea of driving around, late at night, with the one you love. I'm sure my irreverent new wave penchant had something to do with it. How could it not? Practically every third song is entitled Behind the Wheel and details getting hit with a double decker bus. Romanticism aside, at 19 years young, I was determined to get my license and make my soundtrack.

Since my parents refused (and refuse) to get in the same car as me, I was left to have driving lessons. Of course, my first driving lesson was booked on the morning following the single most drunken, debaucherous party of my life. Unkempt and still drunk, I wasn't so much terrified of crashing the car as I was getting breathalised. Has that happened before? Has anyone ever been breathalised in a learner car?

I found the lessons so incredibly infuriating. I got told off for really silly things like "not staring at the mountains in the distance". Soon, I couldn't take any more of it and I applied for my test. Quite similarly to the I-shouldn't-be-doing-law-because-they-accidentally-overenrolled debarcle, I should admit publically that I shouldn't have obtained my license. In fact, the test instructor beeped me within a minute of the test commencing. After my panic attack, I managed to get my license somehow.. and that is the story of how a silly lass like myself took over the roads of Melbourne in a 1978 Yellow Tank. With my best friend Laur in the back included.

So what happened next? Did I indulge in midnight jaunts in the belief that this night can last forever, if we fall in love?

Well, sort of.

I made this tape instead. This tape doesn't so much personify all those old new wave ideals, but it signifies a time and place where all was full of love. I was in love with everything that was coming out of Britain at this time. I was in love with my radio show, Music is My Radar: a venture which allowed me to interview musicians I adore. This was a time when Bloc Party's Silent Alarm hadn't been released. Arctic Monkeys were unsigned at this stage. The Departure were nevertheless inauthentic. It was a time when the music awesome and it was all mine. Then the bandwagon came to Australia and the tape player broke in my car...

Playlist of Mix tape #2: El's First Driving Tape
Side 1:
1. The Futureheads - Hounds of Love (2004)
2. Bloc Party - Little Thoughts (2004)
3. The Departure - All Mapped Out (2004)
4. Arctic Monkeys - Scummy (2004)
5. New Order - Temptation (1982)
6. Moloko - The Time is Now (1999)
7. Milli Vanilli - Is It Love? (1989)
8. Interpol - Slow Hands (2004)
9. Morrissey - You're The One For Me Fatty (1992)

Download Side 1

Side 2:
1. Franz Ferdinand - Tell Her Tonight (2004)
2. The Faint - Southern Belles in London Sing (2004)
3. Cause and Effect - Nothing Comes to Mind (1990)
4. The Postal Service - Nothing Better (2003)
5. Bloc Party - Skeleton (2004)
6. Guster - So Long (1999)
7. The Dears - Warm and Sunny Days (2004)
8. Stroke 9 - Make it Last (1999)
9. Queen - Dear Friends (1974)

Download Side 2

Mix Tape #1: Health Hustles
Genre: Funky Disco vs 1950s ballads
Date: circa 1987

So I figured there would be no better place than Cassettes & Chocolate Milk to feature my first mix tape. The origins of the tape can be traced back to the late 1980s where it was allegedly acquired when I was only two years old. Reader(s) may wonder how was this done. How did Elle acquire such a hunger for cassettes at such an early age? Well, the story goes that my older brother Tomy asked his Grade One teacher if he could have a copy of his class's aerobics music.. a copy was made and I suppose the rest is history? I suppose it is.

The tape was aptly named Health Hustles. The compilation achieved enormous notoriety and extremely heavy rotation in my house. With its inordinate number of Buddy Holly songs mixed with ridiculously camp, disco obscurities, the tape became a major feature of my earliest childhood. Needless to say, that childhood involved lots of cassettes, fake radio shows, dancing, prancing.. actually, when you think about it, things haven't changed that much.

So yes, download and enjoy. The sound quality isn't so great, due to the fact that the tape has practically disintegrated.

Playlist of Mix Tape #1: Health Hustles
1. Buddy Holly - Words of Love (1957)
2. Village People - Magic Night (1980)
3. Bucks Fizz - Shine On (1982)
4. Fame - Fame! (1980)
5. Buddy Holly - Raining in my Heart (1959)
6. Buddy Holly - Peggy Sue (1957)
7. Ottawan - Hands Up (1980)
8. Mickey Mouse Disco - Watch out for Goofy (1979)
9. Buddy Holly - True Love Ways (1965)
10. Bucks Fizz - Making Your Mind Up (1981)
11. Jim Croce - Bad Bad Leroy Brown (1972)
12. The Beatles - O Bla Di O Bla Da (1968)
13. The Beatles - Bungalow Bill (1968)
14. Cliff Richard - Wired for Sound (1981)
15. Abba - Mamma Mia (1975)
16. Diana Ross - Why Do Fools Fall in Love? (1981)

Download Health Hustles (44611 KB)